I'm Clueless...

Well, not really. I can build you a database, write you a simple computer program, build you a simple web page. I know what Fitt's Law is and I can perform heuristic evaluation on you web site or computer application. I know how to run a usability test, a focus group, and I can build a rockin' survey. I can use a screen reader and determine if it is accessible to persons with disabilities. I can build you a Halloween costume from a few pieces of foam board, a roll of Contact paper, and a couple of dowel rods (twice). I can make you curtains, a table topper, a new dress. But there is one thing I just don't know about.

Boys.

Oh, I can work with them - they make great co-workers. I can be friends with them - some of my best friends are boys. But as a "mate", I just don't get their logic.

And, perhaps, its my deficiency, not theirs. In my entire dating career of about 30 years, I've had three "real" relationships and there have been only three guys I "dated". Not a lot of experience. My last "date" was in 2007. (And I'm calling it a date. Otherwise I'd have to admit the last date I was on was in 2001 or 2002. Its been so long I can't remember the year.)

Two weeks ago I met a very nice gentleman. We had an funny conversation about technology. I like that - a geek like me. At the end of the conversation he said, "I like her, she's OK." So I gave him my card, got his number, and told him to call me if he was going to go again next week.

Fast forward a week - back at the same pub. The boy shows up. By the end of the night we were hanging out, chatting, going to the late-night burrito place for a bite to eat. Having a really fun time. He walked me home, and then headed home himself, telling me, "Think of me tonight, I'll think of you." (Now that's a nice thing to say to a girl; listen up guys.) He even called and left me a message that he got home safe.

Now here is where I'm not sure what I should do. I returned his call but got voice mail, left a message. (Long story short. The card has my business number. I left my personal number.) Was it wrong to think he might call back? Am I just a freak to think that? I don't hear from him so I try again. I get him this time and the conversation was awkward at best. We end the conversation with him saying, "If I call you I'll call on the ... number."

Huh‽

But...you said...your message...I thought...hmmmmmm. This isn't what you said earlier.

I really am stumped. I'm not calling back. Ever. I'd prefer to avoid this pub, but I'm suppose to go to a party there next week. Do I say hello and risk being to forward? Do I say nothing and risk being a bitch? I feel like the guy with the pitch-fork in his back.


















I envy women who breeze through all this kind of stuff. It all seems to come so easy to them. I don't know how to flirt; hell I can't even recognize when someone flirts with me.